create new resolution 10 tips



Holidays and the start of a new year inevitably make us think about how we can improve ourselves, and have the life we want in the future. We make resolutions - I must lose weight, I will save more money - and then lose our way. That's because we aren't matching our resolutions with who we are inside. We're more likely to succeed if we work on discovering our inner, Real selves, appreciate who we already are, and then take a chance on custom-made changes, not one-size-fit all resolutions. Here are ten tips for making the new year better in a Real way.



1. Let your values be your guide
There are plenty of people who will tell you what should be important to you, if you let them. Friends, co-workers, family, even the mass media, bombard us with opinions and ideas. Don't just accept what others say. Decide for yourself what matters most and let those values set your course.

2. Take a long-term view
Bad habits, difficult relationships, and other disappointments don't develop overnight. Similarly, life doesn't get better in a moment. Change happens slowly, step-by-step. Have the patience to see it through.


3. Let Go of the 'Shoulds'
When you were a kid, you needed grown-ups to tell you what was right and wrong and what you should do in a given situation. As an adult you can make these choices for yourself. 'Shoulds' produce resentment and anger. Instead, do what you know in your heart is right, and set your own standards.


4. Define Yourself as Beautiful
Fewer than five percent of us believe we are beautiful, but whenever I meet someone, I can see something beautiful in her right away. You may not fit the mass media image of conventional, external beauty, but there are things that make you attractive. Remember, beauty is an inside job.


5. Let Go of Being Perfect
As much as we hear that 'nobody's perfect' it's awfully hard to believe. This is because what we constantly see in the media are air-brushed images of people who appear perfect and we come to believe it is a reasonable goal. When we fall short of perfect, then we feel like failures, just for being ourselves. This year, why not just forget that whole concept and replace it with 'I don't have to be perfect.' The truth is, the people who love you know that you have flaws and just don't care. You don't have to either...


6. Stop Competing
Life is not a game to be won or lost. It is more like a dance that never ends. People who make life a competition live in fear of losing. But if you understand that there's no first prize and no finish line, only opportunities to grow and experience things, then that fear is replaced by appreciation and wonder. Try to think about growing rather than winning.


7. Try a Little Self-Empathy
We all hope to be kind and considerate when it comes to others. But have you ever made an effort to think about yourself in the same way? Most of us spend too much time judging ourselves harshly. It's hard to be happy when you let that little voice inside you endlessly say mean and critical things.


8. Make Friends with Your Flaws
When you stop believing in perfection, it's a lot easier to adopt a new view of those things people call flaws. In many cases, we can redefine these differences and understand them as gifts. What makes a mole a beauty mark? The answer is in your perspective. Why not adopt a perspective that honors all those things that make you different?


9. Listen to Your Body
Many of us lead lives that are so fast-paced and stressful that we push ourselves to the point of getting sick. In most cases, our bodies send us signals -fatigue, aches, hungers - when it's time to slow down, rest and examine our emotions. We can avoid a lot of sick days if we pause to listen to our bodies and respond with gentle self-care.


10. Try New Things
In the end, the important things in life are found in relationships and experiences. We feel good when we connect with others and take on challenges that allow us to grow. If you have always wanted to feel closer to someone you know, take the risk. And if you have longed to try something new - in the arts, your work, sports, or anything else -- give yourself permission to try. A little courage will bring you great rewards in the coming year.

Stress Management With Communication Skill


Now days, every one is very busy, in discharging their duty, either in their working place or in office. As such times are like that, we can’t imagine work without stress, which has become part and parcel in our modern life.

Communication skills play a major role to overcome the stress and strain.

Causes of stress:


1. Probably, You are not in a position, in explaining you views and feelings clearly and in straight manner to others.

2. Your colleagues or others can’t grasp and understand speedily, what was said by you and repeatedly asking you the same thing, causing great inconvenience to you.

3. You may not move and speak freely and easily among your colleagues, in the office and exhibiting shyness.
4. You are doubt about handling new project by yourself, as; you are under the impression that you may not motivate your other co-workers well.

5. You are facing the language problem and so not clearly discussing the related matters, both you’re your colleagues and customers.

6. You may not satisfactorily clarify and giving the solutions to the clients, who approach you whenever they got any doubts.

7. You are probably getting nervousness and also unnecessary excitement, while giving your valuable opinions and suggestions, during the indoor-meetings conducted in the office from time to time.

8. You are not doing proper introspection and self-analysis about your mode of working and may not showing positive attitude for the comments(right or wrong in nature) made against you.

9. You are not making your presence felt in the team work of office, by your sheer and sincere efforts and in discharging the duties.

10. You may not exhibit your talents in the right way and up to the mark.

Stress Management:


1. First of all have self-confidence in your capabilities and develop leadership qualities, which are inherent in you.

2. Read newspapers and books on the related topics, concerned to your job.

3. Attend to the classes on spoken-languages (English and other languages, if necessary), regularly, to improve your working knowledge and freely-speaking ability, on the subjects, related to you work.

4. Avoid stage-fear and shyness and create opportunities to mix freely with the people and also speak in the meetings, without bothering what the audience is thinking about you.
In the initial stages, you may feel nervous but certainly you become expert afterwards in your subject and other related matters.

Self –motivation also plays a vital role in developing communication skills.

“Failure is the stepping-stone to success in life”

Stress Meaning Causes And Management Tips

Now a days, people of every walk of life are not spared from the effects of stress in one way or other, on their health and their behavior with public and family members.
Dr.Hans Selye, the father of stress theory, defined stress as “the non-specific response of the body to any demand made upon it’’. 


The demand can be in the form of,
A threat, a challenge or any kind of change which requires the body to adapt. The response is automatic and at the same time immediate.


Stress is of two types:


• Eustress: It is good in nature and helps us perform better in our dealings with others.
• Distress: It is bad in nature and causes upset or makes us sick.


Common manifestations (symptoms) of stress:


Stress effects can be divided into four categories.


1. Physical effects: The affected person show:


-Fatigue (tiredness), headache, sleeplessness, body pain, stiffness of neck, low-back pain.
-Heart palpitations, chest pain, abdominal cramps (pain in the stomach), vomiting sensation.
-Trembling, cold extremities, flushing or sweating and frequent colds.


2. Mental symptoms:


-Decrease in concentration and memory power, mind racing back.
-Confusion, Loss of sense of humor.


3. Emotional effects:


-Anxiety, nervousness, depression, anger, frustration, worry.
-Fear, irritability, impatience, and short temper.


4. Behavioral type:


-Pacing, fidgeting, nail- biting, foot tapping, increased eating.
-Smoking, drinking alcohol, crying, yelling.
-Blaming others, throwing things and even hitting others.


Causes of stress: The causes are known as ‘’stressors or triggers’’.


Stressors are of two kinds: External and Internal types.


• External Stressors:


These are Noises, bright lights, bossiness and aggressiveness shown on you by some other person,


-Rules and red tapism in offices, death of a relative, loss of job, etc.


• Internal stressors: include


-Not getting enough sleep excess caffeine intake, pessimistic thinking, self- criticism
-Not able to achieve unrealistic expectations, Type-A (perfectionist) mentality.
It is important to note that most of the stress that we have, is actually self- generated and it is paradox that most of the times we blame other persons/ situations for our upset.


How to manage Stress?


1. Changing the lifestyle –Like taking less amount of coffee, tea, colas, etc.
2. Take a well-balanced diet and better not to consume the junk foods.
3. Doing exercises regularly (at least 30 minutes per day), five times per week.
4. Sleep adequately and ensure enough leisure time to do something which you like very much.
5. Do relaxation techniques, like meditation or self- hypnosis etc.
6. Change of stressful situations.
7. be assertive and managing the time and money systematically and carefully.
8. Refute negative thoughts, develop positive thinking,
9. Keep a sense of humor.


If we can learn to manage it, Stress is a positive stimulation for many achievements in life.


Please share your experiences in Stress Management.

How To Defeat The Fear

The following 4 things are common for all living beings:


1. Food: for living and survival.
2. Sleep: to recoup the bodily energy (as sleep provides rest to the body).
3. Sex: It is a biological need and it serves many purposes, like:
-calm up the exiting sensory organs,
-Removes the feeling of loneliness,
-Helps to control the blood pressure,
-Brings pleasure to the mind and body, etc.


4. Fear: What for?
The above four things are even though present in all creatures, man’s response and worrying about them is to some extent is more. But, after fulfilling the three acts, they will not give trouble to you.
But in case of fear, the situation is different and it is always accompanying us. So let us discuss about it and clear the doubts.
Even infants (children below I year of age) suddenly wake up from the sleep and show feelings of disturbance and excitement. That means, since our birth, the fear giving some sort of discomfort to us, with or without any cause.


The usual causes for the fear-complex are:



  • -Getting diseases by indulging in irregular food habits and other immoral activities.
  • -The rich are always spending the days in sleepless-nights, as how to save their huge amounts of money, either from thieves or harmful known persons.
  • -The people with name and fame in the society may think that one day their name may be tarnished, unless they behave carefully.
  • -Rulers afraid of their enemies.
  • -Beautiful women and handsome men worry of their old age.
  • -The good and the noble people afraid of bad and rowdy elements.
  • -Every living being worry about the inevitable death-feeling.



But is there any place on this earth to live in safely and without fear on this earth?



How to overcome fear?

First of all one must know that what we are seeing and enjoying in this word are ephemeral (temporary) and they disappear from our sight on one day. So we should develop detachment and also less inclination towards them.
We should also realize that which is eternal and truthful is nothing but God and once we realize this fact, automatically the feeling of ‘’ this is mine and this is I’’ goes out of our mind and we will be free from “fear”. Other wise the fear of cycle goes on and no mental peace to us.
Our role, as long as we live in this world is just like trustee or steward. Moreover, we are ambassadors of God, in this world. Every thing here belongs to God.
The golden rule is: “where there is detachment, there is no fear’’. Everything moves around depending on “attachment and detachment’’.

How To Make Life Easier In 4 Steps

At times, we all have things going on in our minds. There can be the little worries of having to go to the shop because there’s no food in the cupboards, to the big worries like being severely in debt or having a family member in hospital.


The “problem” with worrying is that it can have serious implications on our physical and mental health. People who have previously been in top shape can let one problem get to them so badly that they start having panic attacks or have their problems incessantly on their mind.


I should know, I’ve had times in my life where I have let my problems literally take over my thought patterns and consume me at all times. Yet, with the four simple steps today, it’s actually fairly simple to literally eliminate unnecessary worrying from your life.


After this, I also believe that life will start to feel a lot lighter, as if a heavy burden has been lifted from your shoulders.


1. Consider the Worst Possible Outcome



A few years ago one of my friends confided in me that he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to continue playing for the school football team that we were on. At the next training session when he didn’t show up, the coach asked me what was wrong, and I told him that my friend might have lost his passion and I wasn’t sure if he would be back.


A couple of days later my friend came back to me and said how he really wanted to start playing again, and had merely been going through a rough time when he told me what he did. I instantly remembered how I had told the coach my friend might not want to play anymore, and started worrying about the possible outcome.


Thoughts ran through my head such as “Would the coach pick him for the next game?”, “Would the coach tell him what I said?”, “Would he be dropped from the team?” and so on. I let this situation really get to me and the possible outcomes really consumed my thoughts.


About a week later I built up the courage to tell the coach I might have been wrong about my friend and the coach gave me a very nonchalant reply “Oh it’s fine, I had forgotten about it anyway”. Instead of worrying for a week, I could have looked at the worst possible outcome – probably that the coach would tell my friend and I would have to explain things – and then just taken action.


The worst that could have happened is rarely that bad when we really look at things, so I advise you to do this with all of the things you are worrying about. Look at the worst possible outcome, and then work to improve on that as best you can.


2. Keep Yourself Busy



The reason that we love Television so much is that it literally absorbs us into what is going on. When we are watching the black box we forget about everything else for a while and are totally consumed in the flashing images on screen.


It is for this amount of time that our worries and problems disappear, even if at the time we aren’t aware of it. It is only when we have the time to think and worry about something, that it actually becomes a problem.


If, on the other hand, you can keep yourself busy doing something like studying, cleaning or just socialising then you limit the time you have to let your problems consume you. After all, something is only a problem when you think about it.


3. Realise You Can Get Through Anything



I firmly believe that it is completely up to us how we deal and react with every single situation in life. And, for that reason, I believe it is possible to see the positive in everything and enjoy almost all aspects of life. That being said though, it is much easier said than done, and there are definitely hard times which we have all faced in life.


Have you struggled? Is there something that has happened in your life that was really terrible? If so, then realise you got through it in one piece. How do I know? Because you’re sitting in front of a computer screen and able to spend your time reading an article like this.


No matter what challenges you have came across in your life, you have been able to get through them. Because of that, you will be able to do exactly the same again with whatever you are worrying about now or anything that faces you in the future.


4. Put Things Into Perspective



Just like looking at the worst possible outcome can force us to realise our worries really aren’t that bad, so can the art of putting things into perspective.


Unless something threatens your health or the health of those around you, then it is not that big of a problem. Debt, a break-up or even losing a material item is really nothing compared to the possibility of death or something really serious.


I remember the story of one man in a poor area of America who really wanted to become a music producer. He spent as much of his spare time as he could making music and honing his talents. Yet, his parents wanted something different. They wanted him to become a lawyer or a doctor purely for financial reasons, despite the fact that he had no interest in either.


They pushed him so hard and so often that one day he ended up committing suicide, leaving a note of how he wished they would have supported him. Put things into perspective.

A complete Mantra To Live Long

Demanding careers, raising a family coupled with pressures of daily life is daunting task for man and woman alike. Exercising or daily workout of 30 minute is the last thing on the mind, though we find time to watch TV or hang out with friends. We can come up with hordes of reason for not hitting the gym. 

Being fit should be a part and priority in everyone's life. Being physically fit helps you to live a longer life. It means more than looking your best on the beach and finishing first in the marathon. By keeping yourself physically fit, your body learns to deal with the stress of daily life. Incorporate going to the gym as a daily habit like brushing your teeth or taking a shower. Devote good 30 minutes to an hour for exercises or any other kind of workout for making you feel fit and look good.

Daily workout or an hour of exercise helps to relieve stress, depression anxiety, increase one's ability to concentrate, think faster and become sharper, helps reduce blood pressure, reduces the risk of life threatening diseases, increases flexibility to maintain muscular tension and tones muscles to build and maintain bones.

If you decide to shove off going to gym, you will miss out on the benefits mentioned above and much more. 30 minutes to an hour of physical fitness is major health investment. 

If this is your first step in the fitness world, get in touch with gyms or personal trainers to see which, what fitness plan suits you the best. You will also come across adverts with promises of keeping you in the best of shape. Learn to differentiate between the real and fake.

After you decide on your fitness plan, you have to start working on the same to stay in shape and keep fit. Don't go overboard on the first day as you might feel very exhausted or burned out. To reach your ideal level of fitness, be sincere, consistent and stick with the program.

Mornings are the best time for doing workouts. Get up an hour earlier and hit the gym. After an hour at the gym you will feel fresh all day long. If you put off doing your workouts in the morning, you are more likely to put if off later due to plain laziness or tiredness from working all day long. 

Another way to enjoy your self being physically fit is to undertake some physical activities such walks, hiking, mountain biking, playing golf, etc, with your spouse, kids or friends.

Personal Goal Setting

How do you begin personal goal setting? What are the areas you can start setting goals? These are questions you would ask if you are new to goal setting.
As a career builder you are probably more concerned about career goals. However, there are other areas of your life that you can set goals for yourself.
Goals shouldn’t be about career alone. Goals can be set in the area of attitude, career, education, family, financial, physical and personal/social. Each of these is interrelated. They are anchored on what you value and what are your priorities.





Your personal goal setting can be in these areas:

1. Attitude

What are the attitudes and habits that are holding you back from reaching greater heights? How is this attitude affecting you, your career and your relationship with your family? Make specific points to change this attitude that is affecting the way you behave. Your attitude determines how far you can go in life. Take time to confront your negative attitude and make a plan to change it. This area of personal goal setting is one of the most important.

2. Career

In the course of interviewing hundreds of candidates, I am sometimes surprised at the number of candidates that do not have career goals. Where do you want to be in 3 years time? Where do you see yourself in 5 years time? How will you get there? What are the skills you need? What are the potential barriers? As a career builder newbie, you may not have all the answers. In that case, seek someone you can talk to or better yet – mentor you.

3. Education

Continuous education is important for success in life. Not just your career. And education should not be just for the sake of career promotions although people often do that. You may want to learn new things that can enrich your life. Learning is a process, a journey – not a destination. You should never stop learning in order to improve.

4. Family

How much time do you want to spend with your family? What are some of the things that you have neglected to do for them the past year? Something that you have always wanted to do for them – perhaps a holiday? Put these down in writing. It may seem simple but trust me this is one area where it is challenging for personal goal setting. Sometimes we misplace our priorities.

5. Financial

How much money do you want to save by when? What would be the big-ticket items that you would like to buy? A house? A car? How much do you plan to earn by when? Having a financial goal is crucial in enjoying the material side of things. Financial rewards are directly related to our careers. Therefore, they are important in your personal goal setting.

6. Health – Physical/Mental

If you aren’t healthy physically and mentally, you won’t be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor. What are the steps you are willing to take in order to achieve optimum physical and mental health? Do you plan to run X number of days in a week? Meditate an hour each day? What are the measurements you would use for the goals in this area?

7. Personal/Social

Allocate time for yourself too. Set a goal to achieve this for yourself. This is your time for the things you enjoy. Is it getting together with friends? Or it could be meeting new friends. Some people measure their success by the amount of free time they have for themselves to pursue their hobbies.

These are some of the areas you can consider when considering your personal goal setting. If you are ambitious enough – choose each of these areas and start writing some goals for these to be achieved for the year.

Tips to Grow Your Career

You found your first job and you feel a little anxious. You think to yourself – “How am I going to survive through all these?” With the right attitude and guidance, you will soon look forward to doing your best.
Like any other career enhancement tips, there are no guarantees for success. However, if you bring the right attitude and decide to take action then you are half way there. Nothing will stop a first jobber like you from shining at your workplace.

1. Self-discipline

The value of self-discipline in a first jobber is often underestimated. Now that you are in the working world you think to yourself, “Is self-discipline overrated?” I will tell you, no. It is not overrated. I have often found new staff with good self-discipline doing better than those who are poor in it.

Let me use a simple example to demonstrate this, assuming it’s a Friday and the rest of the department is planning to go out for a fun night. You have an important document to be completed for the coming Monday. What do you do? Give the fun night a pass and complete the work? Or join the fun and hope that you will find time to finish it over the weekend thus leaving you little chance to perfect it before submission?

Part of self-discipline is also about sacrifice. When you have strong self-discipline, it is inevitable that you would need to sacrifice some fun time to focus on your goals. If you are interested in advancing your career you may take some courses, or even read books to increase your knowledge. All these activities come with an opportunity cost. It could very well mean less time for leisure activities.

2. Success

You're probably thinking, “Success as part of these practical career enhancement tips is funny.” Let me assure you it is not. What I want to explain here is this – if you want to enhance your career, define what success is to you. Once you know what success is to you then you can plan towards that goal. Spend some time thinking what success is to you. Crystallize this in your mind. Assuming you know what success is to you, the next step is to be single-minded in the pursuit of your goal.

Being single-minded means to be focused on your goals. When you focus your energy on your goal, you get more out of your effort. You inch closer to your goals. When you are single-minded other things do not distract you. You know what you want and you power yourself towards it as best as you can so you can clearly see what you want.

Knowing your goal and your personal definition of success is an important element amongst these career enhancement tips for first jobbers. Equally important is to know your own strengths and your skills. If you want to enhance your career, play up on your strengths and improve on your skills required for your job. What are you good at? What are the skills sets you do not have that are required for the job? Build up on those skills.

The career enhancement tips in this sub-section basically means this – when you define what is success to you, you then pursue it single-mindedly knowing your strengths and the skills required to attain that success.

3. Sincerity

Sincerity in your career means a lot of things. For me, as a first jobber you should look at doing your work sincerely and joyfully. Meaning, do not treat your work as a drag. If you feel that your work is a drag, then start by asking yourself. Why is it so, before blaming anyone else – be it the company, your boss or your colleagues. So, be sincere with yourself. What is your core challenge in not being able to do your work sincerely?

Being sincere at your work means doing it with your level best. It means playing your part and taking personal responsibility for your work. It also means to share your learning and knowledge. When you share what you know about a certain task, you become an asset to your unit and this inevitably enhances your career. Many people think, the more they hoard what they know the more advantage they have. However, in my experience this is not true. I find that the more you share the more others are willing to share with you and the more you know.

In summary, the most important and practical career enhancement tips you can start now is – developing self-discipline, learning to sacrifice, define what success means to you, be single-minded in pursuit of your goals by knowing your strengths and skills, and doing your work with sincerity and have sharing as a work value you carry.

How To Develop Positive Attitude at Work

Developing positive attitude at work can determine how successful you are in your career. However, this can be tough especially when things seem to go wrong all the time.
I had my fair share of setbacks throughout my career. Along the way, I started developing positive attitudes to help me deal with these setbacks.
Remember you are your own career builder and you are responsible for your own success.
You can adopt or adapt them in developing your own positive attitude at work.


1. Do The Best You Can And Tell Yourself The Best Has Got To Be Good Enough

How much better can we do a job? I believe, as long as we do the best we can, within the situation we are in - the work will take care of itself. There will always be critics who will come off as what I call ‘fake perfectionist’. People who seem to know how best to do a better job without understanding the limitations you have to work with. Let them be. These people just like to take on the persona of a ‘perfectionist’ in order to criticize.

2. Things Aren't As Bad As You Think They Are

I remember reading a research article once that said only 4% of our worries come true. And the 4% are usually very small worries. When things seem to go bad for me and I start to worry, I remind myself of this. You are better off focusing your energy on your work.

3. Think Positive, As You Think So You Are

'Think Positive' is probably one of the most cliché terms that you have heard but worth repeating over and over again.

You can call it 'count your blessings' or whatever term you want to use. It's the truth, when faced with challenges sometimes we need to ask ourselves, what can be worse?

Get out of the 'Poor 'Ol Little Me' syndrome because that isn’t going to help your cause. Especially when you are trying to complete an important assignment.

Developing positive attitudes at work isn’t easy. As with everything in life, you need practice. Just pick one of these listed and remind yourself of it each time you start to worry or face any challenges.

Five Easy Tips To Develop And Feel Self-Confidence


It’s not true that successful people don’t need any tip for developing their confidence. Everyone needs self-assurance no matter how successful they have been. Perhaps the main difference is that successful people take the tips and internalize them whereas others take them but never use them. So, if you pick up few tips, you need to use them to your advantage. Don’t waste them!
Confidence is necessary to achieve success in life. Don’t worry if you currently feel that you’re lack of confidence, I’m going to share with you some great tips that you can use immediately to boost your confidence. As long as you’re willing to learn and apply it, you’ll be able to develop and feel confidence.

Here are some of the steps you can follow to boost confidence…

1. Make an effort to spend time with confident and positive people. And try to stay clear from negative people. Negativity can spread like a wildfire, so be careful. Fortunately, positivity also has similar effect, it can also spread like a wildfire. Being in the midst of self-assuring and positive people will give you the vitality and strength to always look on the bright side of life despite surrounded by negativities.
2. Find a mentor. All successful people have mentors in life, those who can efficiently guide you, advise you and also offer some confident-boosting tips. You will achieve success faster if you can find a good mentor. He or she may have a great deal of experience in the field that is similar to yours. Therefore, can help you avoid mistakes in your endeavor. In order to find a mentor, you need to be open-minded and willing to discuss both your strengths and weaknesses as well.
3. Understand that confidence is just a feeling. Think about all the situations where you have felt confident. Such positive thoughts can make you confident in future. Sit down for a few minutes everyday and analyze the happenings during your day. Imagine all the things that make you feel certain. This can boost your morale and make you even more poise.
4. List all your reasons to be confident. Try and list all the qualities that have helped you to be confident today. Include your victories, skills and also mention about your goals. After you have done this you will see how powerful your analysis can be. It will make you feel even more confident.
5. Never stop learning! Learning doesn’t stop after school graduation. There are much more things to learn in real life than in school. Be a big advocate of continuing education. Never stop to improve and upgrade your skills. That’s how you improve and maintain your confidence in real life. DO NOT strive for perfection or flawless performance as this will only make you feel stressed. Always strive for IMPROVEMENTS instead!